Ok, this newest version of the shoe bombing thing… I have to mention it. Not only was it ridiculous that the first guy tried to blow up his feet (which, I can tell you in the stupidest way of trying to kill yourself. They call it “shooting yourself in the foot” for a reason. YOU DON’T DIE. You’re just injured enough that you can’t escape. Which means you DON’T get your virgins, but your virginity will most definitely be threatened. There are 20 tattooed men in the shower waiting to take your ass cherry. FAIL.
But this new version, I’m not going to get into the semantics, we all know the gist of it – the people with the information about who may be dangerous to let into the country weren’t sharing that information with the people who LET PEOPLE IN THE COUNTRY. If you want to find something out about someone, just do what every college kid in America does. Facebook them. It should be part of standard airport security protocol. If their status is “Kaboom”, you may need to “randomly select” him for special screening. “HelGAAAAH! Weev got anozzah vun…” If you have a grown man in front of you with the status of “Mr. Tinkles is at it again! Hahaha What a stinker!” Then you may again need to fear for your ass cherry.
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